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INSTANT MESSAGING ...What are you saying?
Not to scare the heck out of you or anything, but statistics tell us that almost 2 million women are physically assaulted each year in the United States. And, perhaps more horrifying, one in four women will report a sexual attack or rape at some point in their lives. Keep in mind also that most cases of sexual assault are not reported, so these numbers are likely only a small percentage of what the real picture is of violent crime against women.
The point here is not to frighten you into staying indoors for the rest of your life...it's to help you learn the real, and personal, importance of being aware of your surroundings and having an exit strategy for when danger may be present.
First and foremost...TRUST YOUR GUT INSTINCTS. We've been hardwired for 10,000 years to respond to danger with a fight or flight response. When you've got that weird feeling in your gut, pay attention to it. So what if your friends think you've gotten slightly paranoid? This is where the better safe than sorry thing comes into play.
Fleeing. First and foremost, think about what you're wearing and how it may hinder any escape you need, or may help an attacker hold on to you. High heels and other fashion footwear may look great, but it can keep you from running when you need to. Why not wear something more comfortable (and safe) and change when you get to your destination? Worst case scenario...plan to kick off your shoes and run barefoot if need be.
Seeing. Our experts all advise the same first thing: be AWARE of your surroundings. Scan parking lots while pulling in to look for loiterers or other suspicious types&use your mirrors regularly to make sure no one is following you. When walking alone or with friends, keep one eye on what's going on around you and don't get so wrapped up in the conversation that you forget to be safe. Also, when you're walking alone, PLEASE minimize using a cell phone or headphones from your MP3 player in unfamiliar or potentially unsafe areas. Attackers look for people who are in their own zone . Send out strong vibes that you are in touch with what's happening around you.
The Eyes Have It. Instead of ignoring each person walking by, make eye contact. This may scare off a potential predator since they'll know you can identify them. It also sends a strong message about your attitude -- empowered and aware of what is going on around you.
Loud and Louder. Check out the possibility of buying a personal attack alarm. You should carry it in your hands to use immediately to scare off an attacker. It should be designed to continue screaming if it falls to the ground.
Okay, so be a little lazy. We're often told to take those stairs for a little more exercise. But, many times those same stairwells are the least safe place we could possibly be. If in doubt, take the elevator. And when the doors open, make sure you see who else might be in the elevator, who gets on with you, and be prepared to get back off immediately if you feel uncomfortable.
Buddy, I cannot spare a dime or the time. Women tend to be more sympathetic and are more inclined to be helpful. Uh, stop that right now. You don't have to be flat out rude (unless your instincts tell you to flee), but don't let strangers slow you down by asking for the time, directions, or help around their car. You can offer to call a state trooper if they're in need, but do not get close to them or let them move into your space . NEVER NEVER NEVER move out of eyesight of other people to speak with or look at some alleged problem that a stranger needs help with.
Variety, the spice of life! Stalkers and other predators follow, track and recognize the routines of their targets. Vary your routines so that you aren't always parking in the same spot at work, at the mall, or when you're out running errands. When you go out to run or walk, take a different route and identify spots along the way where you could ask for help if you needed it.
UH OH. It's Too Late.
Danger's here, and now what? First, DO NOT give up. You've got options here and need to stay focused on what you can do to get out of trouble.
RUN!!!! Even if your attacker is armed, if you can break free from his hold on you, start running as fast as you can towards an area where there may be other people. Under high stress situations like this, even your attacker is being dosed with adrenaline and the odds are that he won't be able to hit you, even if he does shoot.
Fight like a Wildcat. Do whatever it takes to get away from the attacker. Remember all those movies where the young woman is being held and is kicking, screaming, etc.? If your instincts tell you that fighting is the best move, try all that. Go for the soft spots like eyes, throat, nose, groin, etc. Bite whatever flesh is in front of you, and fight relentlessly. Make sure your first moves are your best and strongest defense. And, do whatever you can do to either get away or keep the attacker from moving you to a less populated area.
Give 'em what they want. At the end of the day, jewelry and money don't mean much. Heck, if you think giving an attacker your car is the best way to save yourself from harm, DO IT.
When you're driving alone, keep these points in mind to reduce the potential for danger:
As we've stressed many times, make sure your car is in good condition so you you can avoid breakdowns.
Always have your keys in your hand as you near your parked car. It bears repeating: only park in well-lit places where you can leave and approach your car with good visibility of what's around you.
Even though you may actually be in a well-lit spot, as you approach your car, always look around it to see if there are places where an attacker might hide. And, look into the car before getting in it, even if you left it locked.
Of course, keep your car LOCKED while you're driving.
Never pick up hitchhikers or give rides to people you don't know well (like that fun new guy you just met at the mall).
Make sure you leave at least a car length between you and the car in front of you at traffic lights, stop signs, etc. If something happens, that's your escape route.
If you feel you're in danger, use your horn to alert others around you and possibly scare off your attacker. Sound the horn in potentially dangerous situations.
Keep a safety kit in your car that includes flares, a blanket, bottled water, a flashlight, matches, and a shovel. Kitty litter or sand is also useful if you drive alone in the winter and there's a chance you could get stuck in snow.
If you do have a flat tire, drive to a safe place. So what if you ruin the wheel? It's your LIFE and that's worth a whole lot more than the $200 it may cost to replace a wheel rim.
Be very concerned about civilians who try to stop you in an unmarked car who flash what may be a police badge. Don't roll down your window or get out of your car. Think about calling #77 to ask for a marked police car to be called to the scene.
If you are in a minor fender bender with the car behind you, and you're suspicious that it was intentional or the person seems not quite right, stay in your car with the doors locked and call the police.
Copyright
2004 Safe Smart Women
Safe Smart Women is a 501(c)3 Organization
